IF YOU DON’T WANT TO READ A RAMBLE MADE FOR HUMOR, JUST SKIP TO THE CHARACTERS!!!
Disclaimer: I’m a deadpan snarker, so I don’t mean all of my insults, never on this site. This is the only time I will ever put this on any of my posts. Wow, I can’t believe I said that.
Alright, jerks. You wanted more, you got it. I worked my magic. So I came up with a great Evil Plan, distort and change characters that we like, and warp them into another form. Sounds simple right? WRONG! Well OK yeah, it is. But it takes actual thoughts for it to work. And it’s full of win.
In other news, I said to just make shit up. It doesn’t need to be the same world, same powers, same friends, whatever. It could be something completely original, a brand new overcomplicated history that ruins the canon, or just a few tweaks to make them better. They’re not per se our idealized versions of these characters (except maybe for Kyle’s version of Katara); they’re just a shot at something new. The text was just grabbed at random from a chat, spell checked, and not improved. So you get what you get, Feel free to ask for more. Oh, you don’t want more? Well then, Screw This I’m Outta Here
…
In other news, we also didn’t bother coming up with a comprehensive list of the differences between the original character and the alternate character. It helps to know what the original character is like and at least a portion of their series (even we made a few of these using series we weren’t that familiar with). And… holy shit, who the hell writes this crap?* Oh right, back to my job. If you can enjoy the concept of the character as it’s written, that works just fine.
In other news. I’m sure there’s a 92.27% chance that at least one of these characters will look sickeningly similar to other versions of the character. If that happens, I didn’t plan it. All of this was created by Kyle and I. I didn’t copy your little versions of them, either, but feel free to use mine. Just check the copyright crap, that’s Kyle’s territory.
Lastly, I’m going to put notes after characters that need them, but not otherwise.
I also really hope that you like them, ’cause it makes it all worth… really, who writes this crap!?
Sam
*Kyle wrote a rough draft of this in my voice. I changed everything, except I DID NOT TOUCH! The one paragraph except to add that little comment.
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Character: Two-Face
Series: Batman
Writer: Sam
Description:
Harvey Kent, a hard working family man, couldn’t make enough money as a lawyer to pay for his large family. In his spare time, he fought as an illegal fighter, and never once lost a fight. After a run in with Rupert Thorne, the man who owned the ring, Harvey had his face scarred in an electrical accident, and took on the identity of Two-Face. He now runs a massive league of illegal fighters, and is Batman’s equal in a fight, even when Batman has his gear on hand.
Notes: In the first comics, his name was Harvey Kent, so screw you.
Character: Danny Phantom
Series: Danny Phantom
Writer: Kyle
Description:
A boy with a ghost form and a split personality to match. While the two sides are generally in agreement, sometimes one must rise above the other. On rare occasions, Danny’s two sides are separated from each other; which body is possessed by which personality (and has which powers) seems to be entirely up to chance.
Character: Prince Zuko
Series: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Writer: Sam
Description:
After failing in the political style of his country, Prince Zuko left the Fire Nation to search for the Avatar. After searching for 7 years, he found nothing. Then, at age 20, he joined the military, starting as a private, like everyone else. After 15 more years, he is a war hero, and the strongest man in the world (with only his sister and Admiral Zhao having a chance at matching him in Fire Bending), the Avatar returned. Now, Zuko hunts him across the world, leading a legion of 6,000 trained men to bring the Avatar in, no mater what the cost.
Note: Zuko+20 years of training+6,000 elite soldiers=Win.
Character: Katara
Series: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Writer: Kyle
Description:
After witnessing her mother’s murder as a child she has vowed to increase in power however she can to avoid losing control of anything she loves again. As a teenager, she has attained some degree of mastery of her bending art, but she still clearly has much to learn. While generally respectful of her brother’s decisions, her desire to become stronger sometimes leads her to make rash decisions, which may endanger herself or her friends. Having learned from Sokka and Hakoda over the years, she can pose as a makeshift leader or tactician, though she’s clearly no substitute for the real thing.
Character: Joey Wheeler
Series: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Writer: Sam
Description:
Although just a normal boy in school, and not a good student, Joey found he had some skill at the game Duel Monsters when he won a local tournament, and $100. Since then, Joey has entered many of them, and won lots of money to spend on his family. Joey went mostly undefeated, until at age 18, he lost his first tournament to 16 year old, Seto Kaiba. A year later, Joey barely forced a draw in another tournament, this time against 14 year old Yugi Moto. Joey has a fiery rivalry with the two of them over who the best duelist in the world is.
Character: Scarecrow
Series: Batman
Writer: Kyle
Description:
Formerly a brilliant scientist, Jonathan Crane specialized in fear–particularly fear inducing and inhibiting chemicals. Perhaps the result of an experiment gone wrong, Dr. Crane has since gone mad, donning the persona of the Scarecrow. While he seems calm at first, he quickly becomes unhinged as he attempts to strike fear into innocents (or his foes, should anyone intervene). He seems immune to fear himself, as he ekes out only a raspy laugh when one would think he should be afraid.
Character: Wario
Series: Super Mario Bros.
Writer: Sam
Description:
Wario was once a noble knight in the Mushroom Kingdom army, a hero for his men, but not a famous soldier. Then, he was captured by Bowser, who attempted to twist him to his side. Wario refused, and was tortured as the result. He was saved by his old friend, Toadsworth. Wario returned home, to his wife, who was horrified at the sight of his disfigured face. As was everyone. Wario got on a ship and left, joining up with pirates in that time. Although honorable, he found he had no choice for survival than to work with them. After the ship returned to dock, he found the Mushroom Kingdom had been taken over by robots (Mario RPG). He tried to save the Kingdom, but was overcome by the attackers. After being imprisoned, his mind snapped, and he remembered the pirates. He felt their greed overcome him, and followed their example. Ever sense then, Wario has been all about wealth, and is no longer at all noble or kind, but a gross, cruel, and heartless thief.
Character: Naruto
Series: Naruto
Writer: Kyle
Description:
A young boy training to become a ninja and unknowingly possessed by an ancient demon. At least that’s what the village leaders think–Naruto knows all too well what he is. He inherited a large amount of (book) knowledge from the demon, and daily struggles against it to maintain control. He occasionally allows the demon to control his actions in exchange for its power, but after the death of his father he is loathe to resort to this option. (He is also very protective of his mother because of this.) While he wishes to be a great hero someday, he fears he is doomed to be a destroyer. But he doesn’t think about that much–might as well enjoy the time you’ve got, right?
Character: Isaac Faust
Series: Golden Sun
Writer: Sam
Description:
A young boy with psychic powers from the town of Vale. After the power of Alchemy was threatened, he was forced to go on a journey to protect it. Isaac resented his job, until he got the plan to use it to his own ends. His companion, Garet, eventually figured out his plan, and faced him in combat about it. An epic battle ensued, in which Garet only won because of his higher weight. Isaac survived, and returned when the last of Alchemy’s four light houses was activated, and he tried to steal the power for himself, but was stopped by Ivan and Alex (as the others at the location battle among themselves.)
Character: Duck Dodgers
Series: Duck Dodgers
Writer: Kyle
Description:
A genius, pure and simple. Centuries ago, he discovered that there was life on Mars, equally unaware of life on Earth. A brief study revealed that the two races could never live peacefully side by side. A rough calculation predicted that a war would start 500 years later, so he cryogenically froze himself, leaving a droid to strategically place him underground where he would be discovered at roughly that point in the future. His skill would then lead him to become a high-ranking official in the war. Even in this position, however, he could not make peace–one side would simply abuse this trust to infiltrate the other. Sad a fate as it is, he must keep the war going and as evenly matched as possible. The way to do it? Obfuscating stupidity (along with the occasional moment of critical memory failure). So far, no one suspects a thing.
Notes: I fuckin’ love this one.
Character: Soren
Series: Fire Emblem (9 & 10)
Writer: Sam
Description:
A young fencer of some skill, Soren grew up in a home he hated, with a woman who couldn’t stand him. She gave him to an old traveling merchant at age 9, who disliked the boy, but trained in him fencing, and merchantry. At age 13, Soren left him, and was hired by the Greil Mercenaries. After working with them for 2 years, Soren left. He then met another Fencer, named Ranulf, who bested Soren in skill by far. He was impressed with Soren, and asked to take him on as he apprentice. Soren chose not to go with him, but back to the Griel mercenaries, who hired both Soren and Ranulf. At age 16 now, Soren is currently being trained by Ranulf to become a master fencer, while seeking to open the boy up to the world, and be less hateful of everything, including himself.
Character: Link
Series: The Legend Of Zelda
Writer: Kyle
Description:
As a boy, Link learned that his destiny was to be a hero and save the world. But he wanted no part of it. Trying to escape his destiny, he ran away and tried to take up residence in other locations. Each new place he came to, he lived in for a short while. Destruction was not far behind him, it seemed though, and he would help to protect his new home, and then leave quietly still hoping to escape his destiny. Ironically, his running eventually made him into the hero he was hoping he wouldn’t have to be.
Of the ones that I came up with, I’d say Naruto was my personal favorite.
[...] Excerpt from: Character Rewrites — Set 1 [...]